so saturday our training was easy 90min bike but then everyone had core but i had so much because i dont noe how to use my core muscles aperntly hahaha anyways i got board and went to explore more fun ways with core by using the medicine balls this is the one thing i love about the oval yu can grab any piece of equipment form the gym and do anyhitng with it and pple just asume you noe wut yur doing its awsome! so after that me and alanna watched some short track this was alannas first short track watching experience …lol anyways i then went home to go to costco with steph ya were that cool i finay got a new microwave after lyk a mounth or not having one meh such is life we then hung out ect yu noe the game so sunday i was going to 17th with niki and alanna to get funky spandex for training so alanna got these pokadot pants and niki got silver spandex and i got bronze oh man there so funny so anywasy we deside were gonna get stuff for jordan so as were about to pay i see these mesn underwear and we get him these pink ones then at the dollar store we find fuzzy hand cufs a cinderlla bag and a skate rag with mini mouse on it so we get that then later on a car with a fat lady on te front(jordan is obssesd with fat pple) so anyways we go to eat at the cutes organic resturant salad was soo good and everyhting i loved it on 17th ave so anyways then we go pick up deserts at alannas and off to jordans so theres some superbowl betting going on basicly everyone is going for the bears so lyk we deisded earlier me niki and alanna were gonna go for the opsosite team there for the colts witch is good because we atlest new manning was the QB anywasy mark is a mouth one with his bears team hahaha and kept mkaing fun of us anyways in teh end colts won so at half time we gave jordan his gift
he then put the underwear on and put the rag in it and well didnt take it off till he was going to bed so i was told
this picture is jordan hugging me with his underwear on

so this past weekend was canada cup to in fort saint joh BC now let me tell you FSJ is one classy town lol they also should be called iceland there is ice everyware walking to walmart about 3 people fell also the one morning walking to the oval before races i fell and smashed my head off my gig it was not pretty also it was early in the morning so i wasnt sure wut happend but anyways we arrived there and were told no skating today the ice is melting a bit oh that sucked lol so we go groceries after realizing we had alot to cary back mitch had the idea to take a shopping cart and push it back so we did it was so funny and actualy alot of work the cart almost tiped many times lol the next day we were able to skate but werent told this till about 6pm at night so we skated in the dark i found this very sketchy as to not skaitng outdoor ice much or remembering that it wasnt smooth lol so the competition goes on it went ok i guess the hole trip was so funny the runns the ice the fact that everyone there drives a big truck so funy and id lyk to say wow jordan effing belchos is my hero he shut everyone up and did amazing although he got dqed in the 1500m and had a reskate but it didnt count towards points but i mean these things happen right unfortunitly but still love him to death and am so proud of him oh wow he was just an animal bascily how he alwyas was at inline but proved it at long track no one expected it to happen
comming back was probabaly the mst funniest time of my life me and steph got keith to move so we could sit together lol then we took lyk 50 pictures of us bing dumb then after niki couldnt tlak because her stomach hurt yet she kept expalining to pple why she couldnt talk lol then me and alanna running around taking random pictures or tring to steal a cart so funn
all and all the trip was halrious and i miss maddy joce and erin already

there are pictures form the trip if yu wanna see

omg skool is such a hassle right now oh man everything is lyk due riite now and im freeking out because i had it all done but im still lyk is it good enough and now i need to aply to colage ya im going to colage for a sports bussiness program it should be prety cool you can runn alot of stuff with this i really wanna get teh full degree in this i think not just the BA also my friend suze is taking the same thing so hopefully i get in the marks yu need arent to high its just i dont really have the marks for the courses i need because well i havent done the diploma yet:s cuz mine are in april ugh so messed up shouldnt have done that for sure but oh well also today because while i was away my pscholgy book was due back and now theres a waiting list and well i cant finish the cours without the text book and im basicly gonna cry my TA is trying to do everything he can or so he says lol but we shall see also today i had to go to an english seminar i read the stuff but did short point form notes and then i was hte only person there and had a nice little one on one with the teacher at 1st i was lyk omg this is gonna suck but then it was ok were supose to go to reddeer sometime this weekend this will be my 4th skating outdoors trial so we shall see how it goes im sure itll be fine yu use shorter stride outdoors so if i keep mine as long as they are i might just be ok hahaha and also maddy erin and joclynn will be there so it will be fun no kim tho shell be in st froy tho witch will be exciting

so my spiral in beliving in things is getting worse today i had majour depression moments trying to find if love is really true. i watched teh movie “the last kiss” this movie made me lose all hope i had in love and relationships i nolonger see a point if i can be hapy with my friends why do i need to be in a relationship when all thats gonna happen is im going to get hurt and well i cant deal with hurt life is already chalenging enough with out the need to inflict pain apon myself because of some boy.

i truly belive panic at the disco descripes my ever feeling in there song “lying is the most fun a gurl can have without taking of her clothes” ya the song is a bit over played and such but its truly how i feel as a teenage gurl was he worth it?
and well life is full of guys who just want tou for other things but then again whos to say that as the gurl yu didnt want those things did yu walk in to an open door and then shut the door yurself behind you and locking it without knowing the problems that lay infront of u?
Is it still me that makes you sweat?
Am I who you think about in bed?
When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as you're sliding off your dress?
Then think of what you did
And how I hope to God he was worth it.
When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as your fingers touch your skin.
I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck
Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me
Girl I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of

Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?
No, no, no, you know it will always just be me

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?

So I guess we're back to us, oh cameraman, swing the focus
In case I lost my train of thought, where was it that we last left off?
(Let's pick up, pick up)

Oh now I do recall, we were just getting to the part
Where the shock sets in, and the stomach acid finds a new way to make you get sick.
I hope you didn't expect that you'd get all of the attention.
now let's not get selfish
Did you really think I’d let you kill this chorus?

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?

Dance to this beat
Dance to this beat
Dance to this beat

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster

I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck
Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me
Girl I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of
Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?
No, no, no, you know it will always just be me

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?

So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Dance to this beat
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Dance to this beat
And hold a lover close
Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster


so i finaly finished my 2006 run by the things that happend and things i leanrd

r.i.p. 2006 and all of the experiences, events, people, and disapointments you gave me.

in the past year...

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.

I've learned that two people can look at the same thing and see something totally different.

i lost the person i loved more than anything the boy who stayed up with me till teh wee hours of the morning for many times to make life easier the one who showed me who i could really be and how far i could really go he pushed me to my limits and i pushed him back to his things ended and looked like nothing would come again untill the moment we cam back although i never wanted to things to be the same i just wanted to live out the promis i had given to always be his bestfreind i lived out my part of the bargan but he broke his in a jelous state unfortintly when it comes to love people change and you never really know how to keep them around but if he ever see's this i want him to know that no matter wut i wil keep my promis and be his best friend

I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned that doing the "right thing", is not always right.

I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we feel, no matter what others do.

I've learned that judging a book by it's cover may "not be right" but generally your first impressions of people are correct. Besides, everyone else does it.

I've learned that you should never justify your actions or feelings to anybody else but yourself is a complete waste of time.

And I've learned that trying to prove something to someone who doesn't really matter is pointless and reckless.

I've learned that either you control your attitude, or it controls you.

I've learned that even if you prove someone wrong, sometimes people's egos can not just let them admit they were wrong.

I've learned the true meaning of the word "fake".

And I've learned the difference between confidence and arrogances.

I've learned that it's impossible to learn everything you need to learn. And that even if you knew everything in the world, what would do with your gift?

I changed my hair style about 20times to 20 completely different ways

I realized that if i were about to take back all the regrets and mistakes i have, I'd be left with nothing and what would i change all those memories for? Nothing. They make me who I am, and I refused to believe that if I hadn't been through some of the misfortunes in my past, that I'd be a better person. |

I've realized that kindness should never be confused with weakness.

I've learned a lot from my past realationship, but that it was a huge waste of time trying to work things out.

I think uncover the catalyst! slutbag homewreacking whore has well-established patterns of pursuing sexual conquest to silence their inner pain!
I've learned i have a mild form of autism and RLS.

I've learned that true friends accept you as you are, but that would never stop you from trying to change them.

I've learned that we need not destroy the past. It's gone anyways.

I attending many fun summer events. And saw the Calgary stampeede

I've learned that people will tell you whatever it is you want to hear at a current time, then completely contradict themselves later on.

I learned that trying to change someone will always end up in dissapointment.

And I've learned that trying to change for someone else to fit their needs is something im just not content with anymore. Because no matter how hard I tried, I always deston fail in the end.

I've learned to accpet my life for all that it isn't and to not mind my limitations.

I've learned that Life is an adventure without final meaning, but still worth experiencing. Since there is nothing else, life should be lived to it's fullest and derive meaning from human existence. So I believe that no matter how futile you believe your life is, enjoy it.

Life list:

1. witness a Miracle
2. Save someone in one way or another
3. Meet that guy who thinks I’m the most amazing person he's ever met- and he the same to me
4. Have my dream wedding in fall
5. Stand on the Equator
6. Have a best friend that i've had since high school
7. Drive a golf cart
8. Sky dive!!
9. Go gallivanting about Europe
10. Discuss my notions of Good&Evil with two people I consider prime examples of each
11. See the pyramids
12. be a champion at something
13. Have some one think my life is amazing
14. Tell someone my whole story of life, every aspect and event
15. Take a pilates class
16. Do yoga on the beach
17. Watch all Olympic events live even if not at the Olympics
18. Mardi Gras in new Orleans
19. see a broadway play or musical
20. dance with Disney character
21. ride in a strech white hummer limo
22. be my best friend's maid of honor at her wedding
23. met lance armstrong
24. love unconditionally
25. be loved unconditionally
26. stay intouch with the people who got me to ware im going to go as in coaches
27. ride a mechanical bull at a country bar
28. win a large sum of money in a casino
29. travel to...J A P A N
30. GERMANY
31. soul
31. Paris
32. switzerland
33. korea
34. italy
35. California
36. hawaii
37. england
38. Egypt
39. tell the person I utterly don’t like why I don’t like them so much
40. tell my cuzins they are my insperation
41. make a difference in some one’s life
42. ride the biggest and tallest rollarcoaster
43. shop in the Edmonton Mall
44. across Canada ROAD TRIP
45. meet someone in person from the internet
46. go on a cruise
47. go wite water rafting in ALASKA
48. adopt a puppy and name him hank
49. Go to univsity and graduate
50. desighn my prom dress
51. build an igloo
52. fly first class
53. go to the Sandiago zoo
54. have no regrets
55. solve a rubik's cube
56. be told, just once that someone doesn't know what they would do without me
57. be considerd an expert at something
58. Just a single day, eat everything i enjoy, as much as humanly possible
59. Live and breathe everyday like it’s my last

loves an excuse
to get hurt
and to hurt
do you lyk to hurt?

so lately there has been alot of drama in evert aspect of my life i really dislyk drama but nomatter what i do it just keeps comming up. lyk this weekend at canada cup one the after party turned in to drama nomatter how hard i try the drama just fallows me i realize i talk to alot of people but does that really need to cause drama. it seems to be everyware i go i seem to meet a new friend and then later comes another drama aspect seems to apear. i really dont understand it i really dont get involved i just try to help my firends out when they feel bad about things ok i will admit this week i started a little something but started it maturly and it got out of hand thats fine that drama doenst bother me at all because as of today im done with it but because of something some one told me about a gurl hating me it took me all weekend to talk to her after tlaking to all her firends and turns out were good friends now we got along great and find ecuther extreemly funny so i dont get it my firend says drama fallows me because so amny pple lyk me and other get jelous but do pple really get jelous of pple with friends and are well lyked?

there is simplicity in living a fullfilled life.
live your life to the fullest.
don't hold anything back, dont be afraid.
you live and you learn, mistakes are good.
it's better to learn the hard way then not learn at all.
enjoy the power and beauty of your youth,
oh, never mind
you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth untill they've faded.
you are not as fat as you imagine, don't sweat the small stuff, it only causes you unneeded stress.
the real troubles in life are apt to be things that never crossed your mind.
do one thing everyday that scares you.
sing.
don't be reckless with other people's hearts
don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
don't waste your time on jealousy.
sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
the race is long and in the end it's only with yourself.
remember the compliments you recieved.
forget the insults
smile through the tears even as your heart is breaking, it helps.
keep your old love letters, you'll look back and smile on the memories.
love and let your self be loved, love people undonditionally, love them the best way you can.
enjoy your body, use it every way you can.
don't be afraid of it, or what other peope think of it.
it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
dance, it feels good.
work hard to bridge the gaps between geography and lifestyle
because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal
wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts
and making it look more than it's worth

so lately because i live on my own and because all my firends drink alot ive realized that i dont lyk to drink much at all i mean the most ive ever drank in my life was a cuple mounths ago in calgary at a party and its not lyk i was fall over drunk b4 that ive drank probabaly 2-3 times and each of those times were just little light headed nothing to impare who i am and how i acted to be honest i dont see why pple feel the need to drink everyweekend lyk we were going to have a party new years eve but because of practice no one really did much and were all upset because they couldnt drink due to canada cup one this weekend and insted the excuses were oh well sunday well get drunk iunno i have nothing against my firends who drink yur choise really if thats how yu have fun then super for yu id rahtre go to the bar and dance then get smashed iunno maybe im retarded